Too low on spoons, just fork off

Have you ever heard of the spoon theory?

The spoon theory is a chronic illness metaphor used by us spoonies. So often I get asked, " What's it like to have a chronic illness." There isn't a right way to describe it. It's always remembering, no matter how good you feel today, your illness is always there. You could always be one day away from a cold, infection,or flare. It's knowing you need to relax today because tomorrow is a big day where you may need to borrow spoons. We learn to plan, plan, plan, and know that even when we plan it won't go that way. So let's break it down from the top. In the spoon theory you have 12 spoons to use to get through your whole day, and everything takes spoons.

Good morning ! Time to wake up and take on the day. But waking up will cost you a spoon. Do you want to shower? Two more spoons. Do you hair or makeup to be presentable and not look like a bridge troll? Two more . Did you sleep well last night? No? That's a spoon! Don't worry it only gets more fun from here.

Potentially within the first two hours of my day I could be down six spoons, that's half of my spoon allowance for a whole day. You want more spoons? I've wanted more spoons for years. You slowly learn what is important on those rough days. Taking medications, waking up getting dressed, going to work, socializing, and house work all costs spoons. Without my medications I would be without spoons for the next day, and possibly the next. Due to the medications I take, I can't take them on an empty stomach. Standing in the kitchen to cook then actually eating costs two spoons. Let's talk clothes. Sadly I can't just throw on the first thing I see in the closet. Do my hands hurt? No buttons. I could easily be up five pounds from my normal weight due to meds. Now my favorite shirt is out. Did I sublux or dislocate a joint ? Now my brace doesn't fit with certain clothes. I also have low blood volume, so compression socks or abdominal binder needs to go on.

Before I got sick I would make sure I was presentable for running into Clay Matthews (insert your future ex husband here ) . Complete hair do, full face of makeup, and coordinated outfit. Having a minimal amount of spoons made me reevaluate life and what was actually important. Sure society says you have to look completely put together, for fear of being labeled a "person of Walmart." The house must be spotless at all times, for fear of someone actually thinking you may live in said house. Three course dinner must be cooked homemade because leftovers are overrated. Listen. Save your spoons. I've come to terms with staying in P.J.s if I'm not feeling hot. Crockpot freezer meals for the win ya'll! I've learned its not the end of the world if there's a dirty dish in the sink. The world won't implode because I didn't dust or do all the laundry. We learn to adapt. Instead I'll use that extra spoon to go to love my animals. I'll use that extra spoon to go visit family and have a cook out the next day.

I've learned to not be proud. Ask for help when I need it. Know I cannot do it all alone and that's okay. I've learned to take the help and push my pride of being super woman aside I know I am strong enough to do it on my own, but brave enough to know I don't have to.🖤🖤